The Beginnings of Croatian...

They’re laughing again. What’s the joke I ask? B translates for me and I awkwardly chuckle whilst everyone else has moved on to the next topic of conversation.

Back in 2011, when I first properly heard Croatian, it sounded much like Chinese – in the sense that, unlike Latin based languages, you can’t really pick out any familiar sounds. I remember thinking how angry it sounded – assuming that whenever B would speak, he was having an argument with someone!

B is fluent in English, so fluent in fact, that people don’t assume that he’s a foreigner. This made life outside Croatia seem pretty normal for the two of us. We understood each other’s jokes, stories and he has slowly learnt to appreciate the dry British sense of humour.

It wasn't until my first trip to Croatia to meet his family, that I realised things wouldn't be so simple. His mother speaks no English and his father only speaks a little from his time working onboard container ships. I will never forget the first time we all had dinner together - in true Croatian style, the table was filled with an abundance of food, drinks and jokes! I found myself in a world where I wasn't understood and I couldn't understand. In the beginning B would translate but then it just become too exhausting for us both. I sat quietly and politely nodding my head and smiling where I thought it was appropriate but I honestly didn't have a clue what was happening. It felt very lonely for a long time - I didn't know where I fitted in and if I would ever feel that I would fit in.

After a few trips to Croatia, generally feeling like a lost sheep, I decided I needed to learn some Croatian so that I could at least get an idea of what my new family were talking about. B and I had tried to practice a little but the reality was that it was always just too easy to speak in English. I had mastered saying thank you (hvala) and hello (Dobar dan/Bok) and of course picked up the odd swear word, of which there are many and mostly shouldn't be translated into English!!

I started to self study using a book called 'Beginner's Croatian' by Aida Vidan and Robert Niebuhr. It is a great book that I can definitely recommend and really helped me to understand a lot of the basics. Now its just a case of being patient and trying to learn a little everyday.

Its true that smiling and warmth transcend beyond language - I always feel welcome with B's family. HIs mother and I, although we have never really had a proper conversation, she is one of the most caring people I have ever met. I just hope one day, my Croatian will be good enough to let her know how much I have appreciated her warmth and generosity towards me for so long.